Jealousy

Your Tough Ministry & Church Questions Answered!

I get jealous sometimes...

Q. "Ok, I admit that I get jealous of some of the pastors with mega churches and also of the different TV ministries that my people watch and give support to. Our church is small, the building is old, and I just feel stupid sometimes. Especially when one of them goes on and on about how “the Lord is blessing” such and such a ministry. For some reason, I feel compelled to point out the ways that ministry is compromised or is off base in their teachings. Then, they just say I sound bitter. Maybe I am."

A. Somebody said that “Jealousy is the trigger of mediocrity.” I don’t know about all that, but I know we can’t flow in the Spirit if we are jealous (love is not jealous) or are bitter. I know from early personal experience the truth that:

1. Jealousy will make a person lose focus. You're focus is on condemning them for succeeding and on justifying yourself for not doing as well. Many young ministers scoff at their more fruitful colleagues, hinting that, “if I would compromise my convictions, I could have a big ministry, too.”

Do you REALLY believe that the path to ministerial “success” is to sell out? If so, then why are you trying to grow? When you get jealous, your path is set by THEM rather than the Lord.

2. Jealousy causes a person to lose respect. If you are perceived as jealous, people are not going to respect you. They know that you are not walking in the Spirit. They know that YOU would be used like that other ministry if you could, and they know you should edify and not condemn.

They will never respect you for your negative insights into your successful brethren’s ministries. So, what do you say, when you know the other guy is leaving out major parts of the gospel?

You say something nice about him, you acknowledge that God is blessing him, and then you may add, that from what you understand, he doesn’t seem to emphasize certain points that you think are important, but God DOES seem to be blessing him in some ways.

Sometimes, I just say, "I really have no opinion of him (or her). He (she) must be doing something that people like. He (she) has a lot of people who like what he (she) is saying!"

3. Jealousy causes a person to lose leadership. If you're jealous, people will not follow you. They see it as smallness on your part. They feel that you have lost the ability to compliment a person, or be happy at the success of others.

You need to at least outwardly be convincing when you say nice things about that ministry that you just can’t stand! Be a leader! Know that time is the test of all things, and truth will be revealed without fail – even without your potshots.

4. Jealousy causes a person to lose fruit. When we badmouth another ministry, we can be certain that some of our members either love that ministry or are actually involved with it on some level.

If it is another local church that we are badmouthing, be sure that your members have friends and or relatives who attend there, and may even be trying to get them to attend. Your bad mouthing can push them over the edge, because the other church is more loving, positive and friendly.

Jealousy can divide an entire church. We need to celebrate the victories of everyone around us, including those whom we can’t stand!

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Your Tough Ministry & Church Questions Answered! I get jealous sometimes... Q. "Ok, I admit that I get jealous of some of the pastors with mega churches and also of the different TV ministries that my people watch and give support to. Our church is small, the building is old, and I just feel stupid sometimes. Especially when one of them goes on and on about how “the Lord is blessing” such and such a ministry. For some reason, I feel compelled to point out the ways that ministry is compromised or is off base in their teachings. Then, they just say I sound bitter. Maybe I am." A. Somebody said that “Jealousy is the trigger of mediocrity.” I don’t know about all that, but I know we can’t flow in the Spirit if we are jealous (love is not jealous) or are bitter. I know from early personal experience the truth that: 1. Jealousy will make a person lose focus. You're focus is on condemning them for succeeding and on justifying yourself for not doing as well. Many young ministers scoff at their more fruitful colleagues, hinting that, “if I would compromise my convictions, I could have a big ministry, too.” Do you REALLY believe that the path to ministerial “success” is to sell out? If so, then why are you trying to grow? When you get jealous, your path is set by THEM rather than the Lord. 2. Jealousy causes a person to lose respect. If you are perceived as jealous, people are not going to respect you. They know that you are not walking in the Spirit. They know that YOU would be used like that other ministry if you could, and they know you should edify and not condemn. They will never respect you for your negative insights into your successful brethren’s ministries. So, what do you say, when you know the other guy is leaving out major parts of the gospel? You say something nice about him, you acknowledge that God is blessing him, and then you may add, that from what you understand, he doesn’t seem to emphasize certain points that you think are important, but God DOES seem to be blessing him in some ways. Sometimes, I just say, "I really have no opinion of him (or her). He (she) must be doing something that people like. He (she) has a lot of people who like what he (she) is saying!" 3. Jealousy causes a person to lose leadership. If you're jealous, people will not follow you. They see it as smallness on your part. They feel that you have lost the ability to compliment a person, or be happy at the success of others. You need to at least outwardly be convincing when you say nice things about that ministry that you just can’t stand! Be a leader! Know that time is the test of all things, and truth will be revealed without fail – even without your potshots. 4. Jealousy causes a person to lose fruit. When we badmouth another ministry, we can be certain that some of our members either love that ministry or are actually involved with it on some level. If it is another local church that we are badmouthing, be sure that your members have friends and or relatives who attend there, and may even be trying to get them to attend. Your bad mouthing can push them over the edge, because the other church is more loving, positive and friendly. Jealousy can divide an entire church. We need to celebrate the victories of everyone around us, including those whom we can’t stand! www.STEVEDAVIS.ORG FREE Podcast \| Constitution & Bylaws YOU need! \| Contact All images & content are subject to copyright SteveDavis.org TM	Home Your Tough Questions Answered Leadership Challenges, Skills & Tips Ministry & Church Government The Constitution & Bylaws You Need! Get Them Organizing & Functioning Leadership in The Lord's Churches Who is Dr. Steve Davis? Dr. Steve Davis in the News CDs, DVDs, eBooks & Merchandise FREE Podcast! Links